همیشه‌ی متروک

- I remembered my ex.

- Which one?

- I couldn't remember which one. Did you ever think someone posses you? Or something?

- Yes. Yes, I noticed that. Everytime I noticed, I wanted to leave. Some people care to create a family. They think it's worthy. Some others, care other things. An individual do not think why, when cares something. An individual melted in society. Society thinks that going to college is a value. Individual avoids his personality. He runs to go to college. He struggles to go to university. He challanges for good job. or marrying to nice person. Always a competiton and necessity to win.
- What is winning?! Think yourself as Antonius when you achieved your biggest glory. Think you came to Paris and you stand in the middle of city. and think all other people below you. And you are at the top of power. When you are alone at that moment... if you say "What the hell happened? What will happen now?" then you loose. you have lost. I mean you have lost at that moment in your biggest glory.
- And being aware of it... As an old native indian says: Does it offer us what life can not offer? or, as a radio listener said: art, as all other things, is only for sex?

How much an old native indian can be mistaken?

- sometimes he can.

- Sometimes he hush.

- sometimes wants to talk.

- sometimes wants to listen.

- sometimes wants to stay alone.

- sometimes wants a friend.

- sometimes wants to leave.

- sometimes leaves.

- sometimes he cannot leave.

- Sometimes he scares to not able to leave anymore.

- Some are born to sweet delight.

- Some are born to endless night.

- Sometimes you die.

- Sometimes you can not die. Sometimes even all conditions are ready, you can not die.

- Sometimes a man wants to go far.

- sometimes you go, only for able to come back.

- Sometimes you cry.

- Sometimes you can not cry. Sometimes you drink, and sometimes you want to drink a lot. and sometimes you are already leaving for drink.

Sometimes you catch a cab in Acibadem, and say: to Kadiköy. Sometimes he doesn't even look at your face.

- Sometimes a woman is coming... sitting in front of you... and crying.

- Women are always crying.

- Sometimes a woman says to you: "What I'm afraid the most is womens cry". "If I loved much" she says... "If I loved much..." But she doesn't know, loving is momentary.

- Everything starts with water.

- Philosophy too.